The Tweed Pig Pulls a Christmas Hat Over His Eyes

Trousers Prepared for Expanding Waistline

The gates at Tweed Towers have clanged shut for the Yuletide break. Old Jack, the night watchman, has been supplied with enough mince pies to get him through the next few days, as the workers trudge home through the snow and ice to warming firesides and crackling log fires.

The Radio Times has been marked. The biggest turkey in the shop prepared. The waist-adjuster buttons ('Daks tops') have been loosened for expansion on the trousers. All set.

We wish you a restful and enjoyable Christmas and a prosperous New Year.